10:42 a.m. - 2003-11-18
short entry for this morning...
my mind was so calm this morning it was uncanny.
i sat there in the car, trying to ignore the waning migraine (thank you excedrine!) and realizing that my brain was just about as empty as empty can be.
it was nice.
i have a lot of thoughts about this weekend. more additional thoughts about things that happened before and after this weekend. just soo many thoughts and yet, nothing is bugging me at the moment. i'm sure my mental lull will be violently broken by one thing or another at some point in the not too distant future but all in all, i'm feeling good right now.
things are screwy in some areas but overall, it'll all work out for the best. it always does.
BR was a good time. i have to agree with Kristy in that it was indeed one of the most fun times i've had at the event which is indeed surprising with all the crap we had to put up with and wade through to be able to attend at all. i'm appreciative of the people who worked hard to put it all together.
the classes were great and i'm looking forward to actually attending a couple of other events/activities that we learned about while we were at BR. it's great to be able to get to know the presenters and other prominent people in the scene as to open more avenues for obtaining information about things within the lifestyle.
we also had a chat with D@nny about NEL@ and getting involved and about NCF$ as well. while it's great to be noticed by someone spear-heading an organization that is trying to make a difference in our community, it also causes me to be somewhat concerned that we are becoming visible enough to be bribed into some sort of activism for the community. don't get me wrong. i'm all for fighting for our rights as humans to be able to live the lives we want without all those close-minded morons busting up our fun times but at the same time, i'm not ready for a commitment of that magnitude. so i'm stuck somewhere in the middle of "do i volunteer some of my currently-nearly-non-existant time to help out?" or "do i keep pushing off the groups altogether to avoid the political BS that consistently comes out of these things?"
he says the politics has been reduced within the B0ston scene itself and between the groups as far as members of NEL@ go but somehow, i'm still leery. but, and as i told him i would, i will think about it, review their literature once again and see what i think about plunging into the more law-facing world of our lifestyle... i still fear getting sucked in because of my passion though... so... it will likely be a longer thought process than would normally be necessary for such a decision.
right now i'm wishing that i had brought my laptop to work with me. i have so much more floating around in my head that i'd like to write about but i'm feeling somewhat bad about keeping this window open and typing furiously into it rather than looking into some of the things that went one while i was gone, although, perhaps i shouldn't since things seemed to have gone very well while i was gone with the exception of a few files being late and having to be loaded post-daily-process. bah... it happens so rarely. i'm glad things are quiet around here.
*smiles as she hears the new ButtBoy CD playing in her headphones* i love new music. this is his newest one, the "best of" CD and i've only just heard the first track but i'm thinking that it will all be good since i usually like all of the songs but just tend to think that they match up differently to my ideas of what music should be for different situations (flogging, whipping, f*cking, etc)
eh... work intrudes dammit...
