4:29 p.m. - 2004-02-04
A window without glass...
I received the following email today from some people I have looked up to my entire life... or at least for the last 16 or 17 years of my life. It has saddened me and I wanted to issue my reply here, where I don't think they read, for if they did, I don't think I'd be receiving this email from them.
"Hi everyone, I thought that if you didn't know you might want to hear this. In the state of Massachusettes we have till Fecurary 11th to talk to our state representative or senator to tell him about our thoughts on same sex marriage. I am calling our representative today. The more calls they recieve the better chance this won't go through. you can call (617) 722-200m and the operator can tell you the name of you senator or representative and connect you to their office. You can go online to www.macathconf.org, call MCC at (617) 367-6060. Mailing address is: Hon. (Legislator's name), State House, Boston, Ma. 02133. Spread the news. Thak you for you time. God's Peace,"
I am surprised and a little saddened to receive this from people I have respected all of my life. I respect them no less for their beliefs and believe that they should support those which they feel most need their support.
Having become really good friends with people in the gay community and indeed spending a fair amount of time travelling in their circles and participating in events that support their organizations, I have become somewhat open minded to the way they choose to live their lives and I am accepting of that wish they choose to do. I, in fact, have chosen to pursue some same sex endeavors as it pleases me and I enjoy it muchly.
I am not so far out of touch with the bible to remember that we are all God's children and deserve to be treated justly and fairly until He decides if we should be allowed into Heaven or not. I do not remember anywhere in the bible where it codemns people to hell or takes away their right just because they choose to live their lives contrary to the norm. I should indicate that the only place I ever remember learning that is at one church or another where they had taught me to dislike people who are not like me, who do not follow the same belief set, who are not actively pursuing God's will as according to them.
There has been much discussion in the different circles I travel about this topic specifically. There has been talk about what will be different if the law does go through (which I believe it already did so I think this email is already too late... I know that same sex marriages are already recognized by the state, although the legislature doesn't seem to provide for ceremonies to be performed legally here in Massachusetts). For me, from my jaded perspective on marriage, I don't see why people would want this type of union being that it is truly only a piece of paper of worth only to the individuals who share it and need to obtain it to be considered married in the eyes of the law.
I suppose it does help in the way of benefits and such, but the additional value of marriage is lost as, at least pre-Bush, there was more of a tax penalty than a tax benefit to being married.
I suppose my skewed thoughts may also have something to do with the fact that a lot of the alternative lifestyle people I know (alt. lifestyle here being gay or lesbian) are highly polyamorous and though they may maintain a primary, don't often seem eager to tie the knot.
I don't know... I suppose all of this is coming out of the fact that I couldn't find it in my heart to send my reply to these people. I love them dearly but they have hurt me in a way that they cannot know. I have always considered them open minded and, after many years and much change in their persons, mostly progressive. I suppose I was blind to some aspects of them because they are like my parents and I guess I projected the image I wanted to see rather than looking deeper.
I am still trying to formulate a response to the email but I'm wondering if I should just delete it and leave well enough alone. To me it matters little since if they were to think me crazy for sitting on the opposite side of the fence as this program I would lose nothing really as myself and their daughter are both adults now and perfectly capable of making our own decisions about our friendship instead of them saying I cannot come over anymore or whatever they may have done when we were younger. I guess I would just mourn the loss of a set of "parents" more than anything else.
I will see what I can come up with, and if anything or nothing, life will continue and I am no less of a person for these thoughts.
I suppose life will always have these little things to deliver up and remind me that what I think I see, isn't always what is there.
Tah for now people.
