9:23 a.m. - 2003-10-14
a better day so far
i had originally intended to write about how i'm not feeling angry any more today. i suppose that would be somewhat of a lie because though i still have anger in some areas, most have cleaned themselves up for the time being. this is a good thing. this keeps Tara out of trouble.
i'm too damned tired. i shouldn't be allowed to think when i'm tired. i've not gotten anything done at work yet because i've been too preoccupied with all things non-work just because those things seem more important to me right now than anything here does. but i suppose i will have to work at some point and that point will have to be soon since i need to get some stuff done and i have a meeting in a half hour to discuss some technical changes to a new schema. fun!
i made the statement to Him this morning that i hate my commute. and i truly do. it isn't so bad for half the year then the other half i feel like hanging myself because it would be more productive than sitting there in traffic watching all these stupid people force their way into and out of lanes that aren't moving either. then there's the crazy people. the drivers who apparently missed the long line for common sense when born or given their licenses. i mean, today i was rolling around in the right lane and there's a tractor trailer truck in the middle lane who nearly took out the car in front of him. i heard the brakes, saw the smoke and in my own unreligious way said a little prayer that the truck would stop before he rammed the car in front of him. he barely made it. sometimes praying has it's beneficial qualities.
religion has been on my mind a lot lately. it's a meld of different types of religious thoughts though. my continuous tirade about organized religions (aka - catholic and such) and my ever-curiousness about the nature of such things as wicca and pagan religions. i wish i had the discipline and time to sit down and do more research but lately i'd much rather just sleep than think about anything beyond my basic existance. i'll just have to keep track of these things for "later". yeah... later...
well, i'm goin to get some work done. hopefully this mellowness holds out. hopefully i'll be able to stay awake all day *yawn* maybe i'll call H on my way home from the gym... hope she realizes to answer the phone within that time frame ;)
