1:09 p.m. - 2003-08-14
Music! Art! Passion!
"My Immortal"
my immortal
i'm so tired of being here
suppressed by all of my childish fears
and if you have to leave
i wish that you would just leave
because your presence still lingers here
and it won't leave me alone
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
and i've held your hand through all of these years
but you still have all of me
you used to captivate me
by your resonating light
but now i'm bound by the life you left behind
your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
and i've held your hand through all of these years
but you still have all of me
i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
and though you're still with me
i've been alone all along
~Evanescence
************************************************************
I love this song. The lyrics haunt me though in a way that only a song with this sound can. It's strange how lyrics take the right music at just the right tempo to make you think, make you stop and listen.
I like the sound of the song. I'd be happy just listening to the music but the words speak to me too in a way that's sometimes hard to avoid. I'm glad that such a song didn't come out at a time when life was more difficult for me. It would have crushed me like so many songs have during my more difficult periods.
Music is a catalyst. At least it is for me. It can inspire me, or make me thoughtful or glum. It can make me want to dance and it can make me want to cry. In fact, the same song can do all at once.
The beauty of the sound of My Immortal is flabergasting to me. The fact that I'll specifically turn my radio up really loud just so I can hear every last note. I do the same with T.A.T.U's song "30 Minutes" because the music is just so haunting to me. I love it.
I love it when music and art can make me FEEL. Band always did that for me. I may never have played an instrument but it was always easy to see and feel when every last one of us was 'feeling' the moment on the field. It's almost like a moment of clarity. The music coupled with the cheering fans always made me get goosebumps. I still get them when I hear marching bands play. It makes my stomach tight and brings the memories flooding back.
Music that is so beautiful that it can bring you to tears has also always amazed me. Band music can do that to me, but the one profound moment that I remember is when I went to see CATS in Boston with my mom. I'm not really fond of the show in general. It was okay, but man, when that woman belted out the first note of memories I lost it. It was just so beautiful and strong and solid that it shook me to the core.
Perhaps I'm just overly aesthetic at times... I'm glad that my first trip to the MAF was with someone who was patient because I must have stopped and stared at many a painting for far longer than a lot of people would. I can't wait to go back there... I never did get to see it all.
Anyway, "My Immortal" had been stuck in my head so I decided to share and expose the rest of the world to it. Now back to my little world of travelling around the net looking for something constructive to do.
